Walking the line

8.1.2012 I find myself at a crossroad- i feel like there is not much purpose for me. after all is said and done..all the spoils of a wasted life.. This year i lost my cat, my gf, my car, almost my hand, almost my life, friends, people like my family, and who knows what else is to come... I had a glimmer of hope but it seems like that gleaming image is just like a star..something that once was..but is no longer.. I feel like i'm grasping at shadows... I've been not going fast for a few days now.. lst break? who knows months ago...year(s)? I'm confused but trying to make it forward...but if my direction is off..? then what way i am going? it feels like just down..my heart hurts like never before and i have done things i can not understand nor believe... what has become of me? Is there hope for me? again.. like once before it felt like dreams come true..but then i realized my life is nothing more then broken dreams...and bad ideas... Maybe i was meant to be alone- maybe i was meant to die in that car accident? would the world even notice my lack of presence? Trying times these are... and i feel so close to just giving up.. btw have a nu band called trmnl.freq (terminal frequency) w/ Just Kevin (DJ Fraud)